Judge Not

I'm one of those people whose emotions seem to spiral out of control sometimes into this endlessly repeating cycle of destructive negativity. For example, I was sitting in the car thinking about stuff in my life I regret. In particular, I've struggled with this one issue for years. Every time I think I've moved past it, it pops right back up again, like one of those Weeble-Wobbles ("weebles wobble but they won't fall down!!"). It's so annoying! I keep thinking about it, and I get mad about my inability to change. I get all discouraged, and then I get mad at myself because what right do I have to be discouraged?! God's done great things in me and for me! Then I start feeling ungrateful and unworthy. God has given me so much, and I can't even give up this one issue. How can I give anything to people when I'm so messed up? Anyway, it gets all kinds of ugly in my head. God really spoke to me the other day about it. He reminded me that he's the only one with the price tags. He's the one who gets to decide what I'm worth. I'm being silly, trying to tell him what my value is. He loves me and thinks I'm worth dying for. He wants me to reach my potential, but he's not angry with me the way I am, or impatient like me, or even really frustrated. He knew all along how I'd be, and he still thought I was worth dying for. Remembering that really helps me to back up off of myself and to give myself some room for error.