I am naturally a people-pleaser, and I've always been one, from what I've been told. It makes life hard and it's not what God wants from me or for me, so I'm working on it. ("Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? ... If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." Gal. 1:10) Though I am improving, slowly, it still really hurt my feelings the other day when two co-workers became very upset with the way I handled a situation. One of them half-yelled that I should stop being so agreeable. What?! That's probably not what you imagined, right? You probably figured that I'd done something bad or was somehow out of line. No, what made them angry was my attitude of accepting a situation that wasn't the best and that wasn't what I'd been promised.
The world is so double-minded regarding Christians. There's a part of them that wants us to be who we say we are, to live up to the Word. On the other hand, there's a part of them that is eager to see us fail. Our standards make them uncomfortable, and when we fail, they feel as if we're now 'on their level'. They're not sure what they want us to do, but they suspect that they want our conformity. Sometimes, I do want to lower my standards just so people will know for sure that I'm NOT different because I look down on them! No, I'm different because I'm looking up. As tough as it is, we can't change who we are just to make people feel better about themselves (Rom. 12:2).
Unfortunately, it's not just the world that's double-minded. The Bible has nothing good to say about people of two minds (Matt. 5:37, Psalm 119:113, James 1:8, James 4:8) and speaks often about the necessity of devoting ourselves to Christ alone. That means that people-pleasing is not okay. The fact that I was so hurt when my co-workers disapproved of my doing what I saw as godly is not a good sign. I should instead be proud that the worst they can say of me (at least so far!) is that's I'm too agreeable!
Monday, August 30, 2010
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Grow Up
I really love the movie "Sky High." If you've not seen it, you should really get on that! In it, the gym teacher calls one of the kids a "whiner-baby." He says it in such an over-the-top condescending voice... it's hysterical!
As funny as it is to see it on the movie, it's not funny at all to realize that you're actually a whiner-baby. No one likes to be immature. As kids, the thing you probably resented most was being called a baby or told you're too little to do something. Think about the number of times you've heard people say "you're SO immature" or "grow up!" It's insulting, even to aduts. But isn't it so easy to act childishly?
This summer has been amazing for me in so many ways, but SHOCKINGLY (note the blatant sarcasm) there are still things in my life that are less than perfect. I know life will never be perfect. I should be used to it. Somehow I'm not. I get my feelings hurt; I feel lonely; I wish that things in my life were different, and so I whine and cry and pound my little fisties, and dream of the imaginary day when everything will be just the way I want it.
God keeps reminding me that he has big plans for me and that I need to wait and be patient. He gave me a great picture of how I need to live based on a 40 hour famine I used to do to raise money with my high school youth group. We fundraised to provide for starving orphans around the world by fasting 40 hours and doing community service during that almost 2 days. Those of us who had done it before threw ourselves into the work and tried hard not to think about food until right at the end of the fast. We knew that the sooner you let yourself think about food, the worse it would be. I feel like the same goes for waiting for God to do something specific in your life. You don't know when he'll move, so you'd best not start thinking too much about what you want to see done.
It's helped me to think like that, but I'll confess that it's not made me completely patient. It's been kind of like a ride I used to ride at an amusement park. You drive this car down a track that has a tall ridge in the middle of it. As long as you're driving straight, you're fine, but when you start to veer off, you get jolted as the ridge keeps the car on the track. God's been keeping me in line, but I keep veering off a little and getting jolted. Better that than crashed on the side of the road!
We were singing a song this morning in church about giving our lives as an offering to the Lord. I was struck by how much I've failed at doing that. 1 Kings 16:34 says that Hiel sacrificed his oldest and youngest sons either on purpose or they died some other way, but both died for the sake of his work (see Josh.6:26). Both biblically and in today's society, the oldest son represents strength, pride, the continuance of the family line, the best of the father. The youngest son is the father's heart, his baby. So Hiel, in essence, gave his strength and his heart for the sake of what he was building. How can I give less to God? It's just so tough sometimes... but God spoke to me this morning about how it's not easy, dying to myself. God is there to comfort me, not to make me comfortable. I need to stop being a whiner-baby!
As funny as it is to see it on the movie, it's not funny at all to realize that you're actually a whiner-baby. No one likes to be immature. As kids, the thing you probably resented most was being called a baby or told you're too little to do something. Think about the number of times you've heard people say "you're SO immature" or "grow up!" It's insulting, even to aduts. But isn't it so easy to act childishly?
This summer has been amazing for me in so many ways, but SHOCKINGLY (note the blatant sarcasm) there are still things in my life that are less than perfect. I know life will never be perfect. I should be used to it. Somehow I'm not. I get my feelings hurt; I feel lonely; I wish that things in my life were different, and so I whine and cry and pound my little fisties, and dream of the imaginary day when everything will be just the way I want it.
God keeps reminding me that he has big plans for me and that I need to wait and be patient. He gave me a great picture of how I need to live based on a 40 hour famine I used to do to raise money with my high school youth group. We fundraised to provide for starving orphans around the world by fasting 40 hours and doing community service during that almost 2 days. Those of us who had done it before threw ourselves into the work and tried hard not to think about food until right at the end of the fast. We knew that the sooner you let yourself think about food, the worse it would be. I feel like the same goes for waiting for God to do something specific in your life. You don't know when he'll move, so you'd best not start thinking too much about what you want to see done.
It's helped me to think like that, but I'll confess that it's not made me completely patient. It's been kind of like a ride I used to ride at an amusement park. You drive this car down a track that has a tall ridge in the middle of it. As long as you're driving straight, you're fine, but when you start to veer off, you get jolted as the ridge keeps the car on the track. God's been keeping me in line, but I keep veering off a little and getting jolted. Better that than crashed on the side of the road!
We were singing a song this morning in church about giving our lives as an offering to the Lord. I was struck by how much I've failed at doing that. 1 Kings 16:34 says that Hiel sacrificed his oldest and youngest sons either on purpose or they died some other way, but both died for the sake of his work (see Josh.6:26). Both biblically and in today's society, the oldest son represents strength, pride, the continuance of the family line, the best of the father. The youngest son is the father's heart, his baby. So Hiel, in essence, gave his strength and his heart for the sake of what he was building. How can I give less to God? It's just so tough sometimes... but God spoke to me this morning about how it's not easy, dying to myself. God is there to comfort me, not to make me comfortable. I need to stop being a whiner-baby!
Monday, August 16, 2010
As Iron Sharpens Iron
I don't know how you are with your friends, but assuming that you're human, I'm guessing that you play the game of Nuh-uh I'm the best. This game has many different variations. At my college, the most common variety was Nuh-uh I'm the most sleep deprived, stressed, and studious. Some variations involved who wasted the most time playing Halo or goofing off in one form or another, but all of the games had one clear winner and a bunch of losers left in awe of the winners ability to _______ (not sleep, study hard, waste time....fill in the blank).
I've realized recently that Christians are finally starting to understand that there are certain things innately a part of humanity that can be used for good or for evil. For example, music. Some people used to claim that music was evil and manipulated emotions. Well, it does influence emotions. The Bible has lots of music (uhm, the whole book of Psalms plus many others) and talks about how we should praise God with music. God knows that music affects us. I'm so thankful for the relatively new Christian music genre! I'm so uplifted by songs that capture my emotions in a way that glorifies the Lord.
I think the 'Nuh-uh' game I talked about is another example of something already in us that can be used for God. We can either tear one another down by trying to be the best at whatever, or we can compare God stories for the betterment of us all! God has done some crazy-awesome things in my life. When I tell my Christian brothers and sisters, they get excited and tell me about what God has done for them. We keep swapping stories, and at the end of it, we all feel like winners. I mean, think about it! Even if I share that God gave me 10 bucks but my friend got $100, I'm still a winner because the same God who gave her $100 is the God who is working in my life. And God is NOT through with me. He has more to do in my life, more blessings to give me so I can bless others. As we share and encourage one another, the 'Nuh-uh I'm the best' game becomes the 'Yes, God IS the best' game. And that's how it's meant to be.
I've realized recently that Christians are finally starting to understand that there are certain things innately a part of humanity that can be used for good or for evil. For example, music. Some people used to claim that music was evil and manipulated emotions. Well, it does influence emotions. The Bible has lots of music (uhm, the whole book of Psalms plus many others) and talks about how we should praise God with music. God knows that music affects us. I'm so thankful for the relatively new Christian music genre! I'm so uplifted by songs that capture my emotions in a way that glorifies the Lord.
I think the 'Nuh-uh' game I talked about is another example of something already in us that can be used for God. We can either tear one another down by trying to be the best at whatever, or we can compare God stories for the betterment of us all! God has done some crazy-awesome things in my life. When I tell my Christian brothers and sisters, they get excited and tell me about what God has done for them. We keep swapping stories, and at the end of it, we all feel like winners. I mean, think about it! Even if I share that God gave me 10 bucks but my friend got $100, I'm still a winner because the same God who gave her $100 is the God who is working in my life. And God is NOT through with me. He has more to do in my life, more blessings to give me so I can bless others. As we share and encourage one another, the 'Nuh-uh I'm the best' game becomes the 'Yes, God IS the best' game. And that's how it's meant to be.
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